Screwed
by Shiranai
Summary: This will be a series of short stories about random ideas, each chapter unrelated to the last. The first story is only a sample of the messed up things to come! Read and Review please...
1. Destiny Stone

Destiny Stone

This is the beginning of a new series that will have unrelated chapters. There will be parodies on movies, TV shows, old entertainment, and other stories on FanFiction.Net. We'll finally get to find out about Cody's strange habits, the true powers of the Destiny Stone, that bizarre watermelon in Tai's ever growing pants, and many more!  
  
If you want me to add a chapter of your own doing or just an idea you had taking form, I'll do! Enjoy!  
  
  


  
Screwed  
Destiny Stone  
  
  


Kari kicked the door open to their house, she lugged in a massive object rapped in blue paper. It was very heavy, but she managed to inch it along, for who knows how long. Hey, Tai, I have a present for you! Come and get it! He came running out of his room, holding a smashed apple pie.  
  
Really? Let me have it! Tai was ecstatic, he hadn't gotten anything from Kari for years, except oral sex.  
  
Kari lifted the present above her head, then threw it to Tai. The large object pinned Tai to the ground, almost crushing him alive. His two arms snaked out from underneath the object, and he slowly unwrapped it. The long concealed present was in fact it was a Destiny Stone. I know you always wanted one.  
  
I haven't had such a good present since the time I realized what I could do with apple pies! Thank you, Kari! Tai slowly moved out from underneath it, and gazed at it for all it was worth. He reached out to touch it, just then it started to glow and honk madly. The power of the Destiny Stone coursed through him, he found himself with powers he could never imagine. All of his cloths instantly flew off and disappeared somewhere around the ceiling. Behold my powers! Grappling Thong! Tai threw his hand up, and blue thong came flying out, choking Kari. He pulled the thong back, causing Kari to be thrown behind Tai, and onto the couch. No one can stop me now! No one! Tai bolted out the door, still naked.  
  
Kari picked up the phone, dialing the number for the International Digidestined Hotline. Yes, hello! Hot, naked, horny teenager on the loose! Yes, bring the condoms! Kari hung up the phone, and ran out the apartment.  
  
Meanwhile, outside and down the street, Tai was running naked, using his Grappling Thong' attack against the unknowing pedestrians. No one stop me, not even my hot boyfriend, TK! Many feet behind Tai was Kari, running down the street after him. She started throwing anything she could find at Tai, including a brick, a stove, an old woman, and Gatomon. But Tai split everything in half with his thong. I said no one can stop me! Don't you listen? Just then a parade of Digidestined appeared behind Kari, with such faces as TK, Matt, and Sora.  
  
The cavalry is here, Kari! Don't worry! TK yelled, pulling out a vibrating dildo from his ass. And we've brought reinforcements! Thousands of digieggs rolled out from every free space that the street had. Tai threw his thong around, smashing each egg effortlessly. Damn! Those cost five thousand dollars!  
  
I have an idea! Kari's eyes lit up. Quick, Matt, give me your single longest hair! Matt frowned, but gave in by pulling a hair at one end. Soon enough, his entire head was bald, quite a shock to Matt's hair stylist. Your entire head was covered with one hair? Freak! Kari looped the hair into one great lasso. I'm sorry I have to do this, Tai! She threw the lasso towards Tai, he retaliated by throwing his thong at it, but the lasso cut right through it. It encircled Tai's neck, choking him, he then fell to the ground. Hurry, we have to help him! Everyone huddled around Tai's naked frame, some of the male Digidestined copping a feel once in awhile. Who has the giant condom I ordered?  
  
I do! Sora raised her hand, then passed it to Kari.  
  
All we need to do is place the condom on his penis, that's it. Kari unwrapped the condom and started to put it around Tai's member, just then she felt a hand on her shoulder, it was TK.  
  
Let me do it, he would probably want his boyfriend to do it, Kari smiled at those sweet words, then gave the piece of plastic to TK. Well, here I go. He slowly placed the condom around Tai's penis. Tai instantly started to shake. Did I do something wrong?  
  
I'm shrinking! Shrinking! Shrinking... Tai spoke as the condom reversed the effects of the Destiny Stone.  
  
What do you think he means by that? Sora asked questionably.  
  
Kari shrugged her shoulders, We'll find out when we take off the condom...  
  
*******************************************************  
  
Tai woke up from a peaceful sleep, What a strange dream. Good thing it wasn't real. Tai noticed something was wrong, Wait a second. Tai shoved his right hand into his pants. Holy shit! Since when did I have a pussy? Tai screamed.  
  
Kari jumped down from the ceiling, The condom we used to reverse the side effects of the Destiny Stone caused your penis to shrink out of existence.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
This little showing of random ideas will continue until all good ideas will be gone, that will be awhile! It doesn't take long to write these things, only ten minutes for this one, so you can expect many more before summer's end. Since my story One World Isn't Enough is almost done, I'll be able to write many times faster! Thank the gods FanFiction.Net doesn't require lengthy plots!  
  
Joy upon joy!


	2. Air Conditioning Vent

Air Conditioning Vent

This is story two in this new series, it deals with Cody's strange habits, and makes fun of other FanFiction.Net stories that I read! Now it's your turn to read on!  
  
  
  
  


Screwed  
Air Conditioning Vent  
  
  


The Digidestined were having a little get together at Tai's house, the only problem was, Cody was missing. Everyone was wearing fancy suits, including the girls and the Digimon. Izzy, Joe, and any other sensible one were drunk on their asses, not surprising they had all seen Jun naked and on top of Daisuke. Tai walked up to the wooden podium to make an announcement, We will now start the biddings for giving me anal sex after the party! What do I hear?  
  
Wormmon raised his hand, Five cents!  
  
Kari jumped up, No, ten cents! Everyone gasped in the shock of Kari paying ten cents for something. That was usually out of her price range.  
  
Davis raised his penis, Twenty cents!  
  
Fifty cents! Ken screamed.  
  
One dollar! Joe mumbled.  
  
Do I hear any other bids? Do I? Taichi looked around the room, then saw Sora raise her hand.  
  
Five billion dollars!  
  
Sold to the girl in the black tuxedo! Everyone got up to congratulate Sora on her wonderful buy. I know, it was the right thing to do! Sora said over and over again to Ken. The party continued with cake, beer, and cheap porn enacted by Mimi and Yolei. No one ever realized Cody wasn't there, not a surprise since he was so short.  
  
Who wants to touch my Futomara? Tai screamed.  
  
You do not have a big penis! Matt yelled. I know! Everyone, including Tai, started to laugh. Tai realized a pair of eyes were watching him, he turned around, and looked at the vent on the wall. Two glowing, red eyes peered down at him, then the vent cover blew off. Cody came flying out, literally, snatched Tai, and flew back into the vent.  
  
Tai screamed as he disappeared into the darkness, Why am I the one that keeps getting hurt in this series? Cody dragged him through the venting system, then came out into a room with a boiler in it.  
  
Welcome to my lair, Genesis! Cody started to laugh like a mad scientist, or Bill Clinton having oral sex.  
  
Genesis? Oh, that's in logan's story, I'm Tai!  
  
But isn't Kari pregnant with TK's baby? Cody was now confused.  
  
No, no, no! That's in Lord Archive's story, Red Digivice Diaries! Get it right!  
  
Oh, screw that! Just give me the Digimon Emperor!   
  
Tai started to fidget, I... I don't have him.  
  
Don't lie, you sexy, sexy bitch! Cody took out his whip that he uses for bondage practice. Where is it? Cody whipped Tai in the ass.  
  
Ouch! All right, here! Tai dug into his pocket, then removed the Digimon Emperor from it. He was presented in all his glory, three inches tall.  
  
Help me! Help me! Tai does horrible things with me that involves Palmon's genitalia! Help...! The Digimon Emperor screamed in a little, squeaky voice. His torture was ended when Cody swallowed him. Cody got out some water to wash the cape down.  
  
That was good!  
  
***********************************************************  
  
Meanwhile, in Tai's apartment...  
  
We all love the fourth floor whore! The fourth floor whore! The fourth floor whore! We all love the fourth whore! Every sang together.  
  
Oh, stop it, I'm blushing! Joe and Mimi chorused at once. They both looked at each other, then started to laugh like little sissies.  
  
Hey, where's Tai? Kari asked.  
  
Tai? Who? Ken asked in return. Everyone looked at each other, not sure what she was talking about. Such an active imagination, Kari! The Digidestined then continued their Viking Night' celebration.  
  
Hey, beer wench, more beer! Sora called out.  
  
Hold your horses, I'm coming! Izzy rang out. Here you go. Izzy poured the alcohol into Sora's mouth, not that she cared. Just then, the ceiling collapsed and revealed Tai and Cody, having hot sex.  
  
Oh, hi, guys! Cody said cheerfully. Want to join us in an orgy?  
  
The Digidestined all ran into Tai's bedroom. Moans and groans started to echo from the room, then the doorbell rang.  
  
I got! Matt said, running out with an erect penis. He opened the door.   
  
Hi, I'm Bill The Clit' Clinton, I'm here for the orgy! A man with a gray hair and an oddly large nose said.  
  
Are you experienced?  
  
Are you kidding? Matt waved him in, both ran to the bedroom, Bill mysteriously already naked. Wow! This is freakier than Monica!  
  
Everyone asked. Davis was on top of TK, he was on top of Matt, and he was on top of Izzy. The others were bus doing there own things, with each other. Bill Clinton jumped in, landing on top of Joe, both moaned in pleasure.  
  
Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! someone screamed as she received a nasty thing.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Thank the gods for little or no plots! This was so funny to write, especially when I saw my pet fish mating! The Forth Floor Whore' song was created by a friend when my class was in Washington DC, and he saw the class whore' running around the boy's floor in the hotel. My life is so screwed up, thus the title of this series. Have a nice day...


End file.
